Match Game Presents: The Many Hairstyles of Phyllis Diller

A few years back, I had the pleasure/honor/thrill of producing Phyllis Diller for GSN Live. The entire staff was all so excited about her impeding Friday appearance, we took great delight in the edit bay creating “Phyllis teases” to air all week long. My personal favorite was this one, put together by our show’s editor, Sam West, in honor of Phyllis and her multitude of wigs, hats, falls, beads, and other head accessories. The woman could really pull off just about anything, don’t you think? You can see for yourself below. RIP Phyllis.

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Gary Coleman’s Diff’rent Strokes Best Pal Dudley (Shavar Ross) Launches; First Website Dedicated to Coleman

UPDATE: 5/27/17 – This link, is no longer hosted.

I may be the only person in Los Angeles today watching videos of Gary Coleman’s stand-up comedy routine from 1989, but so be it.

Fans of 1980s television will be pleased to learn that Actor Shavar Ross, who played Arnold Drummond’s best friend Dudley on television’s Diff’rent Strokes (yes, the Dudley that almost got molested by bike shop owner Gordon Jump in that “very special episode,” The Bicycle Man), has created the first website dedicated to his on and off screen pal, the late Gary Coleman.

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Watching: The “Little House on the Prairie” Blind School Fire

A while back, I was stuck at home with a sore throat that was keeping me from sleeping. I was tooling around the dial after midnight and came across a Michael Landon marathon on TV Land. I was not a regular watcher of Little House on the Prairie when I was a little kid, but you didn’t have to be to know the episode entitled, “May We Make Them Proud,” one of the most haunting and disturbing hours of television that came down the pike in the early 1980s.  Everyone my age knows this episode.  It was the talk of the playground the day after it originally aried.

Yes, I’m talking about the blind school fire.

Generally, Little House was a sweet, old-fashioned confection, always topped off at the end with a lovely Michael Landon-ized moral, most often something along the lines of “It’s not nice to make fun of fat kids,” “Don’t make fun of stuttering kids,” “Don’t cheat on your math test,” “It’s not nice to make fun of kids with one leg seven inches shorter than the other,” “Progress is bad!,” “Once you reach forty, it’s too late to find fulfilling romantic happiness,” or “Never hide in an ice house that has a trick lock on the outside.”

But every so often, Landon would slap us viewing sheep upside the head with some perectly repugnant horror story, like a little girl getting raped by a mask-donning psycho, morphine addicts blowing chunks on camera, ma going crazy and trying to gnaw off her own leg, or parents rolling off a fifty foot cliff and crashing into a ravine as their newly orphaned kids wept in the panic brought about by total abandonment.

Also, on occasion, one of the Ingalls kids would get shot in the head, suffer a stroke, get mauled by a pack of wild dogs, or drown in the local lake.

But all of those pale in comparison to the infamous blind school fire.

Television wasn’t promoted to the extent it is now, where audiences are pretty much told all week long what to expect on the next episode. So back in the day, simpleton children such as myself would unwittingly plunk themselves down to watch their favorite shows, bowl of chocolate chip ice cream in hand, expecting nothing more than the upbeat Little House morality plays they were used to seeing, week after week.

Then this crazy shit goes down, and none of us slept for a month.

Let’s take a frame-by-frame look at the scariest-ass piece of 80’s television this side of Gary Coleman  and his buddy Dudley nearly getting molested by bike shop owner Gordon Jump on Diff’rent Strokes.

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Vintage Patrick Swayze – 1979 Pabst Blue Ribbon Commercial

Check out this fantastic (in both style and vid quality) commercial for Pabst Blue Ribbon from 1979 with the late Swayze out on the town with his lovely lady, tearing it up under the neon disco globes, and finally rewarding himself with a cold mug of you-know-what.

The sexy hair! The devastating good looks! Those styling clothes! Those unmatchable moves on the floor dance moves!

It’s tough being a man that has it all.  Me and Patrick… the lord made our life loads heavy

Vid after the jump. Continue reading “Vintage Patrick Swayze – 1979 Pabst Blue Ribbon Commercial” »

10 Things I Learned at The Miss Universe Pageant (Re-post from 2006)

First Runner up my ass! Miss Japan, Kurara Chibana was my choice from the beginning. Well, at least she walked away with the Best National Costume Award, which everyone knows is just as good.

Thanks to my good friend, RumBunny, for taking this pic with her cel phone. I had to push a female Argentinian news reporter out of my way so she could get a good shot.
I had third row seats with my sister at the 2006 Miss Universe Pageant.  Here’s the skinny. I can’t imagine things have changed much in the last five years, but I’ll leave that up to you.

Ten Things I Learned at the Miss Universe Pageant

1.) In an effort to sound less sexist, the contestants are no longer referred to with the title “Miss.” But this oddly made the proceedings rather dehumanizing as Nancy O’Dell and Carlos Ponce (hot!) were forced into objectifying declarations such as, “Korea, come over here!” and “Take a good look… this is Ghana!”

2.) Impressed with the fancy Miss Universe contestant choreography? Don’t be. As they parade back and forth, revolving around one another, there’s a guy at the edge of the stage with a microphone barking out, “Step! Step! Turn! Stop! Step! Step!” I don’t know how that isn’t heard during the broadcast.

There’s also another guy right behind the camerman who wears white gloves and gives them hand gestures indicating when to walk, when to turn, when to stop, etc. He also gives an overly-broad double hand-sweep to the women who have just been eliminated to get the fuck off the stage and line up for their Cover Girl consolation gift bags.

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