The #Bachelorette Desiree Hartsock Recap: May 27, 2013

“Do you know how poor I was growing up?” Desiree asks Chris Harrison. “I was so poor growing up my family had to hang the toilet paper out to dry. I was so poor growing up, kicking a can down the street was called ‘moving day!’ I was so poor growing up, monkeys at the zoo threw peanuts at me!”

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SHOCKING The Cat-chelor: WHO WILL BE MY NEXT CAT? YOU DECIDE! (5 cats going home this week)

Round TWO!  This is your chance to decide which cat I will adopt as my new pet. Each of these cats is currently living at a non-profit, no-kill pet shelter in Los Angeles. But while this competition is in process, they are all residing at a 10,000 square foot mansion in Malibu, complete with indoor and outdoor jacuzzi, a bar in every room, and a landing pad for the obligatory helicopter date.

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The Cat-chelor! WHO WILL BE MY NEXT CAT? YOU DECIDE!

Help me pick my next cat! Mark the ballot below for your favorite three cats. Vote as much as you like, and feel free to leave your comments below. Then check back to see who’s still in the running.

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The #Bachelor Sean Lowe – After the Final Rose – Recap #YourTopTweets – March11, 2013 (ABC)

Drinking game: Drink every time @chrisbharrison says “all of America” #Bachelor Sean has all these girls fighting over him and

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The #Bachelor Sean Lowe Finale Recap #YourTopTweets – March 11, 2013 (ABC)

A finale can be “exciting” or it can be “three hours,” but it can’t be both #Bachelor. Chris Harrison is a sadist. #Bachelor. Calling the 3 hour #bachelor finale “historic” seems a bit much. The wall coming down was historic. 3 hrs of bachelor is just tedious. The #Bachelor sends the message that you should meet your spouse on TV. Call me old-fashioned, but the place to do that is the Internet. The loser of #bachelor should be punished. Make her watch them get married-front row. I can smell the desperation through the screen. #bachelor

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The #Bachelor Sean Lowe Recap – February 4, 2013 (ABC)

it was a pretty standard week on the old Bachelor, with the only interesting behavior chalked up again to Tierra, who I’ve noticed has been singled out about a million times on the web for having a dent in her forehead.

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The #Bachelor Sean Lowe Recap – January 28, 2013 (ABC) – Your Top Tweets

Time to watch some thirsty hoes! #bachelorlor So how about a gameshow, but instead of money, the prize is a

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The #Bachelor Sean Lowe Recap – January 21, 2013 (ABC)

I feel like the producers of The Bachelor have a strategy: when they really want you to like one of the girls competing for the man’s heart, they shove them into a date where they’ll look selfless and wholesome. When they’re trying to make you think the girl’s a psycho, they make her jump off a cliff or a skyscraper hoping she’ll whimper and mumble hysterically so we can feel superior. And of course, when it’s a girl who’s comparatively homely-looking, they make her hunt for bugs in a cave or process her own pork at a slaughtering plant.

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