I forgot to get dessert for the #OpeningCeremonies. Luckily, I have peanut butter and baker’s chocolate. Let the games begin, fuckers!
“Yo London, Imma let you finish, but Beijing had the best #openingceremonies of all time.”
#OpeningCeremonies Would anyone notice if they added a fake country to the parade… like Newfartandstand?
god I hate the way British people talk #OpeningCeremonies
Needs more Monty Python #openingceremonies
There has been an underwhelming number of Spice Girls appearances thus far. #London2012 #OpeningCeremonies #WhatIReallyReallyWant
Princess Di hologram for the #OpeningCeremonies at the #olympics. I’m calling it.
help us, Hologram John Lennon and Hologram George Harrison. you’re our only hope. #OpeningCeremonies
“there’s the queen cheering wildly.” I’m pretty sure that’s not what we’re seeing
And by “there’s the queen, cheering wildly,” they mean “and there’s the queen, standing quietly and calmly.” #openingceremonies #London2012
“Here’s the Queen, cheering wildly for Great Britain.” Sure, let’s go with that. #OpeningCeremonies
The Queen looked utterly bored! Haha! My bf says she’s thinking “It’s past my bedtime & I missed Golden Girls! Dammit!” #openingceremonies
Now they’re apparently doing an affectionate “Tribute to Pollution & Black Lung”. #Olympics #OpeningCeremonies
#openingceremony #openingceremonies They’re making it smell like sulfur in the stadium. First Mr. Bean… now this. Go England!
I like how they consider the sulfer smell in the Olympic stadium to be a bonus. #openingceremonies
#openingceremonies Dancing nannies and kids jumping on beds as entertainment – what is wrong with British people?
I’m disappointed not one of those bed-ridden kids spewed pea soup or spun their head around #tubularbells #openingceremonies
Holy shit! It’s raining Julie Andrews! #openingCeremonies
That awkward moment when it took Harry Potter 7 long books to beat Voldemort… and Mary Poppins did it in 2 minutes. #OpeningCeremonies
Mary Poppins is practically perfect in every way – but that inflatable baby is way sick #oopeningceremonies
Quit bragging about all your musical geniuses, Britain. We invented Hanson. #TEAMUSA #OpeningCeremonies #London2012
#openingceremonies hey who’s leading Afghanistan – he’s cute!
“Albania has never won an Olympic medal.” Is that a set-up or a punch line? #openingceremonies
Here comes American Samoa! Oh wait, no. it’s just 80s pop band The Jets #openingceremonies
There’s a place called Andora? #OpeningCeremonies
oh dear – Angola’s outfits looks distrubing close to Aunt Jemima’s – #openingceremonies
Hello Markus Rogan! How do I get to Austria? #OpeningCeremonies
I love how NBC skips over the boring countries #Olympics #OpeningCeremonies
Doesn’t #Bhuntan mean something bad in Italian? #OpeningCeremonies
When I saw Bhutan at the #OpeningCeremonies, I remembered when Andy Bernard said “it’s on like wearing Sean Jean in Bhutan!”. #TheOffice
Rock on Cameroon! #OpeningCeremonies http://t.co/8yEr2N7b
I want to go to Chad. I never go anywhere. #OpeningCeremonies
Where can I get a pair of Czech Republic rain boots? #OpeningCeremonies
OK, Czech Republic, your footwear stylist, we need to have a chat #OpeningCeremonies
D-J-I-B-O-U-T-I spells Djibouti!!! #OpeningCeremonies
Every 4 years we get to shake-shake-shake our #Djibouti jokes. #Olympics2012 #OpeningCeremonies
Next fuckable country… Dominican Republic! #OpeningCeremonies
There’s too many countries – we need to go to war more #OpeningCeremonies
Christ and I thought It’s a Small World was long. #OpeningCeremonies
Wait we have Independent Olympic Athletes? Are they freelance? Do they train from Starbucks during the week?
GO INDEPENDENT OLYMPIC ATHLETES!!!! #bestgroupever #2012Olympics #openingceremonies
I love the independent athletes. They look like they only ones having any fun. #openingceremonies
Independent athletes are high #paradeofnations #openingceremonies
You know who should narrate the #OpeningCeremonies? Statler & Waldorf.
Here’s Japan…. and no giant robots. Buckets of fail. #OpeningCeremonies
I swear some of these countries are made up. I fully expect to hear “Park Place!” and “Fraggle Rock!” at any moment #OpeningCeremonies
This #OpeningCeremonies needs four judges in chairs that rotate
LOSE. Moldova got the shaft for a WalMart commercial #OpeningCeremonies
This Olympics #OpeningCeremonies needs the San Diego chicken running around and doing the cabbage patch
#OpeningCeremonies needs more COWBELL
psst… between you and me, Nigeria will send you a gold medal if you wire them $10,000 from your bank account #OpeningCeremonies
Saint Kittis and Nevis? St Vincent & the Grenadines? Sao Tome & Principe? Now NBC is just making shit up. #OpeningCeremonies
Every guy from Spain is hot but one… can you guess who? #OpeningCEremonies
Dude from Spain has pink hair #openingCeremonies
I didn’t know Niki Minaj was from Spain #OpeningCeremonies
Does the whole Swedish olympic team work at the Gap? #openingceremonies
“Stanislas” is such a cool name… then you get nicknamed “Stan” and it all goes to shit #openingceremonies
“Even in Syria… I don’t get no respect…”
WHAT THE HELL ARE WE WEARING? #openingceremonies
According to my dad, the US athletes looked like “security guards at Target.” #OpeningCeremonies
@RalphLauren make the #UnitedStates #outfits in #china. #fail
“We’re USA… of course we don’t make our own #openingCeremonies clothing. Have you met us?”
The US is the only team who takes photos of themselves. :/ Just saying. #OpeningCeremonies
Poor Uruguay – like the guy in the circus who has to follow behind the giant elephants #openingceremonies
Yemen, I’m in love with your flag holder. #Olympics #OpeningCeremonies
Brace yourselves everyone…Zambia is coming up !!!!! #OpeningCeremonies
Great Britain’s entrance was seriously #epic. #Olympics #OpeningCeremonies
The British outfits have gold pit stains. #WTF #openingceremonies
All the countries were done in record time? Holy shit how long did other Olympics take? #OpeningCeremonies
You know you’re legit when you have 3 generations from all over the world singing in unison. #McCartney #OpeningCeremonies
For anyone who missed the #OpeningCeremonies don’t be upset. It sucked. #Olympics2012
I missed a rerun of Shark Tank for this? #OpeningCeremonies
#OpeningCeremonies ends w/ the Queen locks everyone up in the stadium and says: Happy Hunger Games!
Due to overwhelming request, NBC will replay the Beijing #OpeningCeremonies immediately following whatever this is.